A Personal Story

Good Morning DearHearts,

Two of my brothers were coming to visit in June.  Technically they are considered half-brothers; we have the same father and different mothers. That biological fact has never been of any consequence to me, I simply consider them my family.

Their names are David and Danny I guess they are “Irish twins” because their birthdays are one year and one week apart.  Obviously they have always been very close.

Although we were not raised in the same home I always felt close to my younger siblings. In fact, they really grew up in Canada so I only saw them a couple of times a year.  The truth is physical proximity is not the standard for having a close relationship.

Over the past 25 years I spent more time with David and he even lived in my house for several months (or was it a year?).  David was always kind, joyful, generous and a dreamer.  He always had another plan to make a fortune and was an artist in his heart.  He also inherited the “gift of gab” from our father.  David could probably sell any commodity to anyone, given enough time.  He was a natural salesman. 

What I did not know in June was that visit was to be the last one. 

David really did not appear to be feeling well.  I asked him what was the problem. His response was “nothing a hundred hours of reiki couldn’t cure”.  I am a reiki master, so that was his flip yet truthful response.

David was less jovial and certainly not as talkative as usual.  However, Danny and I kept the conversation going and neither of us really saw this as an indicator of what would happen next.

Two days later David was delivering a part for work in Orlando and had a stroke. He crashed his car and when the EMT’s arrived he told them, “I think I had a stroke” these were some of the last words he would say. His diagnosis was correct.

David spent the next nine days in the ICU receiving the best treatment possible but the stroke did too much damage to his brain.  Under the advice of the ICU team, his mother made the most difficult decision any parent could ever have to make. She decided to disconnect her son from life support. David was moved to hospice care where Danny continued to comfort him until the end. Three days later he left this physical world.  I believe his spirit had returned to the All That Is much sooner than the last breath.

Throughout this whole ordeal, Danny was there.  He would not and could not leave the side of his “big brother”.  When we wonder what unconditional love is all about- that’s it!  I tried to comfort him from here and tried to get there as soon as possible but it wasn’t soon enough. 

As Danny and I spoke about the unanswerable questions I received clarity on one thing.  Death is not really how it is understood in this world.  In this world death is understood to be the absence of breath in the body.  In reality death is the absence of joy in our life. 

We are meant to be filled with joy and happiness and peace.  This is how each moment is to be lived. My spiritual path, A Course in Miracles, has taught me any moment without joy is wasted. It also teaches the experience of this world that has so much death in the middle happened because we “forgot to laugh”[1]. David loved to laugh, often at his own jokes just in case no one else appreciated his quips.

If David had somehow recovered from the stroke, he would have been left with many medical problems. The possibilities ranged from immobility to needing a breathing and/or feeding tube. His life would have become a limited existence. To a man who chased joy in life the restrictions would be untenable.

The accepted standard of breath indicating life would have rather indicated a breathing death.  Depending on each situation and person, life can sometimes be another form of death, if it is joyless.

Each day, week or perhaps month most people have the experience of disappointments and unfulfilled hopes. These moments can be considered “little deaths”[2] because they are momentary noticeable separations from the joy of life. But they are only short lived and unless we dwell in them they will fade away like everything else in this world.

The fate that seemed to await David after his injury was not going to be short lived or overcome.  So each moment would have been an eternity for both him and those who loved him so very much.  There’s a famous French phrase Joie de Vivre, for those who do not know it means joy of life.  It is the exhilaration of each moment we have through the access of our own free will.   When our free will or our joy is no longer our personal decision we can begin to feel as though we are a victim of our existence and circumstances.  This was neither how David would want to live nor what his loved ones would want for him.

When all of the possibilities are considered there is no doubt that David pursued his eternal life in what many would call death. He is no longer limited by time and space. His unbounded joy is now filling the heavenly space and angels are laughing.

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Unbounded Joy is Available Here-Now,

In Love, Light & Peace

Janet Weissman

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[1] ACIM Text Chapter 27

[2] ACIM Text Chap 27 I 4:8